Gavin's friend?

Last week after speech therapy, another mother and I were talking about how our kids loved "Cars" movie. We discussed characters, and she said they had some duplicates at home, so on Tuesday, she brought a couple of them in for Gavin. So he asked me later why the other boy brought those cars to him. I said we were going to swap them. I was going to bring in Fillmore the bus today for him. So today, we brought Fillmore in for the other boy. After they got there (after Gavin's therapy was over), Gavin went right up to the boy, who he's only seen a couple of times before and we don't even know his name. He went right to the boy and handed him Fillmore. The boy showed his mom and said "look what that boy gave me!" The mother asked him (as she was looking at me) "Did he REALLY give you that?" (Apparently she figured the boy took it from Gavin.) So I said yes, he really did give her son that. She told him to make sure he thanked Gavin. He did, and Gavin gave him a hug. It was so heartwarming! Later, they were playing together on the floor with cars when the boy's mother said they had to go to the store. Gavin insisted we go to the store too. He started whining because he was sad that the boy left. He sounded like a puppy! I kept telling him I didn't know what store the other boy went to, so we couldn't go too, but he was really insistent that "We'll go to Walmart too!" (even though we didn't know if the boy and his mother were going to that store. He was really quite sad that his new friend left. It made me sad for him, so I just held him and rubbed his back for several minutes before agreeing that we could go to a thrift store to look for more "Cars" characters. I was just so pleased that he felt that much of a connection to this other boy. It's not the only one he's played with at therapy, so I don't know what it was, but we'll have to see if we can find time to see this other boy (think his name is Mason) more often, I think. Gavin will probably demand it.

Sympathy!

Gavin has apologies down! The other day after therapy, he had been taking a toy from another boy sometimes, and I kept having him give it back. After he gave it back one time, I noticed the other boy crying and holding his head. I didn't THINK Gavin hurt him, but wasn't sure if he had thrown a car back to the other boy, and the other kid hit his head or what, so I told him I knew he hadn't meant to hurt the other boy, but I thought he did, so he should go say he was sorry. He crossed the room to where the other boy was sitting, knelt down and said "I'm sorry. I didn't mean to hurt you." The other boy tried to push him away, and Gavin repeated "I wasn't trying to hurt you. I'm sorry." Apparently the other boy was pretty much ok after that, because he started slowly going back to playing. I could see Gavin hadn't gotten up, but looked confused, and I wondered why. Not for very long though, because as soon as the other boy bent his head down to play on the floor, Gavin kissed the spot where the boy had been holding his hand to his head. He ended up kissing the boy's head 3 times. He had just been trying to find an opening to do that! His mother turned to me and asked how old Gavin was, and how long he had had that ability (apologies). I told her that we had been working on sympathy recently, but had just started to really get it. Truthfully, it's just been in the last few weeks I think that he heartfeltedly apologized to us, and never had to another person. I know the school would sometimes tell him to say he was sorry to another kid, but I don't know as I believe in teaching kids to just go and say they're sorry. I think teaching them about the real reason they should apologize is better, like to say they didn't mean to hurt someone else. I think that's why Gavin understands it a whole lot better than some kids, to whom "I'm sorry" are just empty words. I was so proud of his apology!

Why/Because

Today, I was working with Gavin on learning the why/because type of question and answer. I gave him simple examples, so hope he figured it out. We also read the short version of "Pinocchio" that he took out from the library. He really seemed to like the name "Gepetto" since he repeated it multiple times. I think he got the idea of what a lie is, because I gave him simple examples of that also. We talked to Nate earlier, and he said he and Jenn used to tell Ari that when you lie, a red dot shows on your forehead that your mom and dad can see. He said she used to cover her forehead with her hand for several years when she lied. That must have been pretty obvious! Sounds like a good idea to use with kids! Although, Gavin's not really lying at this stage yet. He did once, but hasn't gotten really into it yet.

The Opthamologist called today, and said he should see Gavin every couple of months, to keep track of how much his eyes are crossing and if they're getting better. (We noticed it in October, but once he started wearing glasses, they didn't cross quite as much. He's been wearing glasses and these little pieces of tape stuff on the inside of them, called intra-nasals, I think, for months, and his eyes have gotten better.) He had an MRI a few weeks ago just to make sure he didn't have a tumor or anything, and that was fine.

medical update

We went to see the Nephrologist on Thursday. Gavin's bp was higher than it should be, so the doctor wants him to start taking a bp med. Because high blood pressure can cause multiple problems, she wants us to get an ECHO of Gavin's heart to see if the left ventricle might have thickened. She wants to make sure we keep checking his eyes since hypertension can affect the eyes. The doctor said she wants him to have another renal ultrasound in a few months, so we can compare it to this last year. We'll have to keep checking his kidneys as he grows, since we don't know how much, if any, they will grow. Right now, the largest of his kidneys is only in the 25 percentile for his height, which probably means they're not working as efficiently as they should. But as he grows, one or both kidneys could keep growing, increasing their efficiency. We just don't know yet.
They took blood to check multiple things like electrolytes, so after it comes back, we can check with a renal dietician to see if she wants us to put Gavin on any special diet or anything.
We saw the Endocrine doctor today. She said some of the blood-work was endocrine related, so wants to see what that shows before thinking about giving Gavin growth hormone shots. She wants him to have a bone age x-ray before we see her again. She also noticed that his thyroid labs weren't quite right. His TSH was high, so she is starting him on a low-dose thyroid medicine to see if that makes a difference.
She also said that sometimes when he doesn't seem to want to eat, it may be from ketosis,so we should give him some juice or something and see if that makes him hungry afterwards.
WHEW! So many things going on right now! I'll have to write about other stuff later.

Gavin got bullied for the first time

We went to McDonald's Playland today, and there was another boy there, maybe 3-4 years old, just a bit bigger than Gavin. He kept pretending to be a monster and reaching out for Gavin. Gavin, in return, screeched and ran back to me, saying "No! I want Mom!" I did eventually get him to stop screeching, but each time the other boy growled and reached his arms out to get Gavin (he never actually touched Gavin), Gavin shouted "No!" then ran back to me, scared, thinking the "monster" was going to get him.
One of the times, I put him on the playset past where the other boy was sitting (waiting for Gavin to try to pass by). I heard running in the tunnels of the playset, then Gavin RAN down the tunnel, with the other boy chasing him, so apparently the game had progressed to chasing instead of just blocking Gavin from getting onto the playset. I was getting kind of annoyed since the kid stopped Gavin a good 20 times, and his mom didn't say anything to her son. Meanwhile, I was just concentrating on comforting Gavin when he'd run back, and trying to convince him to just walk right by the other kid. Gavin got more courage every time I'd tell him, but then would still back out before he made it past the other kid. Luckily, the mom finally decided it was time for them to leave, since she and her other kid were done eating. It had gotten to the point I was going to just talk to the other boy myself, but wanted to see if Gavin could work it out on his own. Apparently, he couldn't quite this time, but it did give him experience dealing with another kid I guess.
After they left, another mom in the play area said "there goes the playground bully", since she had witnessed the whole deal. I didn't think of it as that serious at the time, but I guess she's right- that's probably how bullying starts. The other boy started out just playing, but then when he saw how much of a reaction he got out of Gavin, he kept doing it. And no one spoke to him about it. I should have, but didn't realize how much it was actually bothering Gavin. After all, he was joining in the fun for a while. I thought he was just playing or pretending it bothered him. But after a while, he wasn't. And I kept thinking the boy's mother would speak to him, as I would have if Gavin was bothering another kid. But she didn't. How easy it is for a little kid like Gavin to get bullied!

Nephrology summary

A few weeks ago we went to see Dr. Najera about Gavin's kidney ultrasound and bloodwork. She said based on his ultrasound, his kidneys are small for his height, possibly indicating Renal Dysplasia. She said based on the creatinine level from his bloodwork, she thought he probably had about 50% function in his kidneys, although she didn't know if it was one or both kidneys, and what caused it. She ordered a VCUG to test for possible kidney reflux, or see if there were structural abnormalities. The VCUG was done last Tuesday, and the radiologist was able to tell me at the time that he didn't see any reflux or structural problems. We haven't heard from Dr. Najera with the results though. So we aren't really sure if she's officially diagnosed him with Renal Dysplasia or not, and what, if any treatment she wants to do.
She assumed he was born with his kidneys not fully developed, but wasn't sure. It sounds to me that it's a bad sign if that's the case. If it was a structural problem, they could probably do surgery. But anyway, we still have to wait to hear from the doctor to see what she has decided. Hope it doesn't involve any special diet, since it's hard to get the kid to eat a lot anyway.

Gavin really wants a popsicle!

Gavin's been sick for a week now, but does at least have an appetite now. So Terry was on the phone to his mother tonight when I saw Gavin grab the handle of the fridge, and start walking his feet up. So Terry put the phone next to Gavin's head and said "Tell Grandma what you're doing." Gavin replied "I'm climbing up the fridge." Quite true! So Terry took the phone back to go in the other room for a minute, at which time Gavin said "I know where the freezer pop is!" very insistently, because he was using the handle of the fridge to climb up to get to the freezer, apparently to get a freezer pop.
He sure is starting to sound like a typical kid sometimes!

E.I. visit yesterday- need more therapy???

Yesterday, the new O.T. (from North Branch), Mona, and Gavin's regular E.I. teacher, Emily came to see him together. Mona brought a large piece of construction paper with 2 smaller pieces of paper cut out to make a flower stem and leaf. She also had a cupcake liner to make the flower. This liner had been cut a couple of times to let it lay down flat. Emily started by asking what this was, what could Gavin make out of it? She finally switched gears and asked him what this was, and pointed to the leaf. Gavin responded "a football." We all agreed that yes, it did look like a football. Emily kept going back to the same question, asking it pretty much the same way every time--"what is this? What can you make with it?" Gavin even had the pieces in the right order to make a flower, but didn't respond. I don't think he knew that it was supposed to be a flower. So I asked him if the cupcake liner was the sun. He didn't answer, but did pick it up and look at it, and try to fold it back together. Mona helped him fold it back together and said that it had cuts in it to let it lay flat, and they could make a couple more cuts even. I saw her give him some scissors, which he picked up and started to try to use 2 handed. Mona showed him the correct way to hold them, with his thumb in the little hole, and other fingers in the bigger hole. I left the room to make a phone call. I returned to find that the flower was done, which means they had cut a couple more slits in the cupcake liner (flower petals), and pasted or glued the pieces onto the larger piece of paper. They also had written his name in crayon on the paper, but I think they probably had him hold the crayon, while they helped him write. Anytime Emily asked Gavin a question, he wouldn't respond, but would repeat exactly what she said. Even at times when he needed help, he wouldn't ask for it (which is typical of him right now), but even when she asked him if he needed help, he wouldn't reply. The only verbal interaction I saw him do, was to repeat everything that Emily said or asked over the course of the 45-50 minutes they were here. The last thing they did with him, was had a lunch tray which they sprayed shaving cream on (which Gavin hates, but is good therapy for him), and had 2 cars to play with. One for Gavin, and one for Emily I guess. I know he did start playing with the car, although I think they had to coax him into driving the car through the shaving cream (which would be typical at this time since he doesn't like that activity.) I wasn't really paying attention, but all of a sudden heard Emily say to Gavin "excuse me." When he didn't respond, she said "Gavin, excuse me." I guess he still didn't respond either verbally or to whatever she was wanting him to do (I think she was saying it to have him move his car so her car could get through someplace in the shaving cream.) He didn't do whatever or verbally respond, so I kept hearing her say "Gavin, I said excuse me" and that type of comment. I never heard her tell him what it was she wanted him to do. She just kept repeating "excuse me." Now, the only time Gavin ever hears us say that phrase, is if we burp, and we have taught him to say excuse me when he burps (although we have to remind him most of the time.) I'm aware that we should teach him that "excuse me" can mean different things and be used at other times besides just burping, but we normally tell him what it is we expect of him. The reason that Gavin is in speech therapy, isn't anything to do with his pronounciation, it's because he doesn't seem to know what we're saying sometimes. He doesn't always know what we're asking, so we have to model the correct answer for him if he doesn't answer us. Instead of giving an incorrect answer, normally what he does if he doesn't know what we're asking, is just repeat the question. I've decided that maybe that's how he copes with stress sometimes, is repeating what people say. Lonnie agreed with that idea today. In fact, she's the one who brought it up today. Anyway, the point is that he never spoke to Emily yesterday except to repeat everything she said. When he wasn't doing what she wanted when she said "excuse me" to him so many times, she should have explained what she wanted from him. She also had asked him different times to use his words, to let her know what he needed or wanted, and asked him if he needed help. He never responded when asked if he needed help, and he certainly didn't ask for it himself. So at the end of the session, she asked me "He's in speech therapy twice a week, right?" I responded yes. Then she asked "And feeding once a week?" I said no, twice a week, same as speech. And she asked if he was getting any O.T. So I said "just as part of feeding therapy. They take the first 20 minutes to do climbing, running, jumping, etc." So Mona interjected that of course that would be to get the body warmed up to eat. Emily didn't tell me why she asked those questions, and they didn't have any Home Visit Logs with them to write up what they did on the visit and what they want him/us to work on so I don't know what she was getting at. I'm assuming she thinks he needs more therapy, but if that's the case, that should be the school's responsibility. They've been seeing him for 3 years now, Emily has been working with him for 2 years now. Just before last summer, she did increase her visits from twice monthly, to once a week (an hour each time.) The O.T. is scheduled to come out once every 2 months. If they think he's so far behind, then they should increase his scheduled appointments. I would object if they think we should have our insurance cover more therapy instead of the school picking up the extra therapy. Especially when his current independent speech therapist hasn't indicated a need for more therapy than he's currently getting. Normally I would be upset about Emily questioning how much therapy he gets, with the implication that he needs more. But considering how much they've been wanting him to go to preschool, I think it was good that he didn't respond to her questions and didn't ask for help, etc. They certainly can't expect him to go to school on his own (preschool), without someone there to help him. As Kasarah says "he needs someone to be there to facilitate communication with others." Emily had said last fall when they did his evaluation and IEP, that there would be a special ed aide in his classroom, but no individual aide for him, because they don't think he needs one. She then at another time said that the special ed aide may not actually be in his classroom, but there would be an aide that may be shared between his classroom and the other preschool classroom, so that the aide may be across the hall from him, but would be accessible to him. Now, for a kid who doesn't respond to people when they ask him questions, and won't ask if he needs something (bathroom, food, water, help, etc.), I would think he'd need an aide in the room WITH him, specifically paying attention to him for the most part. The aide would need to be trained to recognize when he needed something, instead of just assuming that he'll ask if he needs something. Of course, the school doesn't know about his autism diagnosis, but even if they don't know that, they are aware he has problems with speech, which is why they're providing therapy for him in the first place. And that's why he still qualifies for special ed. So maybe Gavin not responding to Emily is a good thing. Because then in a few months when I go to the preschool director and talk to them about not sending him off to school without me, I can at least refer back to yesterday's visit and say "See, you could see that he didn't respond, he didn't ask for help when he needed it, etc. You can't send a kid like that off to school without someone who knows him, to help him." So maybe it was a blessing in disguise.

My smart little man!

I've been horrible about keeping up this blog, but wanted to write a couple of things. The other day, Kasarah told me that she was watching Gavin play with his toy triceratops dinosaur, and she heard him say "Triceratops, triceratops." I didn't know he knew what kind of dinosaur it was, but was glad he knew it. But then she said she heard him say "Kasarahtops", and repeated it a couple of times, so said "Triceratops, Kasarahtops." She just thought it was cute, so wanted to make sure I knew it. I thought it was great because he was playing with words, rhyming!
We took him to the Mall of America yesterday, and picked up Kasarah on the way there. They had a pretty good time, and she even went on the Wonder Pets flyboat ride with him. She told Terry that she thought he did really well there, as most of the kids she worked with wouldn't even have been able to go inside the mall because of it being so loud, and there being so many people, etc. She told Terry that she thought Gavin was really smart, which, of course, we love hearing!
Btw, Gavin said to me the other day, "Zebra starts with 'Z." So I asked him what "monkey" started with, and made the appropriate sound, and he said "M." We asked him another couple of words today, what letter they started with, and he was able to tell us the correct answer. I can't remember what words, but he got them!
A couple of weeks ago he impressed me by being able to count up to 100 with minimal help (I just told him the 10s, and let him count the numbers between.)
On a funnier note, today he saw a picture of a boy throwing a football. He said "throwing." So I said "what do you throw?" Gavin responded "eggs." Great! My kid's starting early!
Yesterday, he pinched Terry, so Terry said "No pinching", and Gavin repeated it. Then Terry said "So why did you?" Gavin replied "Because Gavin pinched Daddy." So he doesn't really understand the concept of why you do something, but he did seem to know that when someone asks "why", the answer starts with "because." That's getting there!

best compliment about our kid

I got the best compliment possible the other day from Gavin's ABA therapist (Kasarah.) She said "He just makes me so happy." She absolutely loves working with him and loves hearing him laugh, and has mentioned how easily motivated he is. I just thought hearing that your child makes someone that happy was one of the best compliments you could ever get concerning your child. His feeding therapist told me that Gavin and the other kid (Travis) just make her day. I'm glad our son is such a positive light for people!
I haven't written anything for a really long time, and haven't even mentioned who Kasarah is, so will do that later.

I got a call from the school's occupational therapist today, to set up an appointment. After talking, she asked me if I was working on getting the letter that E needed for the school (his Early Intervention teacher.) I told her that yes, I was working on it. Thing is, I don't think I should NEED to get the letter. This is the deal--in September the school did their 3 year assessment testing. The results indicated that Gavin qualifies for special education services (from the school) for the next 3 years. Up until the age of 3, services are provided in the home. After 3 years old, they are provided in school. EXCEPT, that I wasn't planning on putting him in school at this time. Yes, we did attend Early Childhood classes this fall, but the school said for him to receive services through them, he needs to attend preschool when he turns 3 in a few weeks (UNLESS we have a letter from his doctor specifying that he is not to attend school at this time.)
I wasn't going to put him in preschool at this time, for several reasons. One of which is his health--no way in hell was I going to start him going to school in the middle of the winter, when he got sick last fall, and it laid him up for 3 months straight. Every time he gets sick (cold/flu, whatever), it's really rough on him. It scars the lungs every time, and considering he already has scarring of his lungs, it makes it even harder for him to recover. So the thing you do with kids with lung disease, is avoid them getting sick for as long as possible, to allow their lungs to develop enough so that the illness doesn't really do them in, and make their lungs worse.
So anyway, I wasn't going to put him in preschool at this time, and only one of the reasons is his health. Another, is that I just don't think he's ready for school at this time. And what I'm ticked off at right now, is that the school will not provide services if I choose not to enroll Gavin in preschool in the spring semester. And yet, I shouldn't HAVE to. So we're pretty much being forced into putting him in preschool when we don't want to. Well, if we want him to get services through the school anyway. We're being backed into a corner--not get services that the school thinks he needs, or risk him getting sick and all that entails. So far, he hasn't been hospitalized when he got sick, but that's because we already have all the stuff like oxygen, nebulizer and sat monitor at home anyway. Next time, we may not be so lucky.

It just feels like I'm always having to justify what we're doing with OUR child. So why aren't we allowed to just do what we think is right for our son?

My little parrot

I'm feeling irritated today. It was a dreary, cold day, which then also gave me a migraine. So it wasn't great. Although, I did get rid of my migraine with medicine, so things were better. But then Gavin really was doing a lot of "parroting" today. I asked him "do you have to pee? Yes or no." So he said "have to pee." So I thought, Good, then go ahead (since I had him on the toilet already.) But then he added "yes or no" instead of answering the question (So he repeated "have to pee, yes or no." I thought maybe he was just tired or stressed or something. Although the speech therapist (L) said he did a good job there today.
Tonight, he was in the laundry room and knocked over our bowl of coins (that we take from the laundry.) He tried several times to pick them up and put the bowl back up on the dryer, but kept spilling the bowl when he'd try to put the bowl back. So Terry went in to check on him. He said Gavin was sitting on the floor saying "Problem. Problem. If you have a problem, tell me." Great, I've got my own little Rainman. (That phrase is one I say to him OFTEN, since he doesn't tell me what's the matter most of the time. I tell him if there's a problem, or if something is wrong, to tell me. He does sometimes now tell me when he wants a bottle, or if he has an ouchie. So we've made progress, but not apparently as much as I thought. He tends to repeat what we tell him when he doesn't understand what we're asking of him (not the only times that he parrots, but that's a common trigger for him.) So I'm guessing he doesn't really get what I mean, when I ask if something is wrong, or if he has a problem. I thought I had broken it down enough for him to understand what I meant, but I guess we need to work on that idea/concept some more.

If you haven't had to deal with the parroting yourself, you have no idea how frustrating it is. Just remember that repeating game you played as kids, where you repeat every word that someone says "WHAT DID YOU SAY?" (and they respond) "what did you say?" "ARE YOU REPEATING ME?"- (they respond) "are you repeating me?" "STOP THAT"- "Stop that" "NO REALLY, I MEAN IT."- "No really, I mean it." (and so forth)

AAAAARRRRRGGGGGHHHHH! That game gets old, really quick. Except with Gavin, it's not a game. He's just trying to figure out how to talk, and figure out what people are saying to him, etc. But it's INCREDIBLY frustrating and mentally taxing/exhausting!

Gavin and autism testing

Gavin WAS diagnosed with autism when we did the evaluation a couple of weeks ago. Shhhh...it's a secret though. Really, we're not telling people. A FEW select people know, and not even all of our family knows, and that's the way we want it.
We don't completely agree with the diagnosis (for more than one reason, one of which is the fact that they diagnosed him on the basis of assuming he was language delayed, when 3 other speech evaluators had told us within a month of the diagnosis that he wasn't delayed for expressive language now. I figure, if they're wrong even on that, I certainly don't believe anything else that they decide. Second, they expected him to do things as far as a 24 month old would do, forgetting about the fact that we've taught him to SAY things instead of just looking at people to convey his requests. For example, they wanted him to look at them to request continuing a fun activity. They didn't know that we've taught him to say "more" or "again, please", and he's said this for months now. BUT, according to the developmental age they evaluated him at (24 months for expressive language, i.e., what he actually says vs what he understands), they expect 24 month old kids to look at a person to continue a fun activity. SO, I have a real problem with them evaluating him at a younger age, when 3 other people had told us within the last month before he went for his autism evaluation that he was caught up as far as expressive language. Like I said, if they got that wrong (I got with majority rules--3 against 1? The 3 wins.), I don't believe other stuff they decide. When their language score affects what they expect him to do, I think that affected the diagnosis. Plus, they said he was language delayed, but I think they forget about the fact that preemies don't tend to be completely caught up by age 2, which also affected some of their diagnosis.
So, I think we're going to wait 1-2 years, then get him tested again. And it WON'T be at that place again. Terry mentioned that he thought they were quite condescending there. I have to agree, but it's unusual for Terry to say things like that, so I figure it wasn't just me that had a problem with them!
Anyway, remember, we're not telling people about the diagnosis. First, because we don't know if it will "stick" when we get him re-tested. Second, we don't want people treating him differently because of the diagnosis, and some people will. Even some family members will. So please, don't tell people.

Gavin DOES pay attention to other kids!

We went to the school's reading night last Friday evening in the school library. We saw a girl from one of Gavins classes (he's in 2 classes, each one has about 6 kids in it.) She immediately recognized Gavin and came right over, kept telling her mom "there's Gavin", etc, and wanting to play with him. They've never played together in class, but that's ok. He didn't even seem to know she was there (he didn't care about the stories they were reading either, surprising to me since he loves reading at home.) So I just figured maybe he really did just play with toys at this time, and not WITH the other kids.
Today, we went to the other class. They went outside to play on the playground since it was nice weather. We got to the door (to go outside) before the other kids, so waited for everyone there. This other little boy, Henry, took off running down the hall (his mom followed right away.) Gavin started to run after them, and I told him no. He looked at me and said "Henry is running."
I thought that was great! First because speech therapists have been telling me he doesn't know his verbs (even though he does when I talk to him. He doesn't necessarily know them in pictures, but does in real life.) Second, it shows he does pay attention to the other kids- not only did he notice the kid running, but he remembered the other boy's name. I've only told Gavin the boy's name once I think ( a few weeks ago), but they do sing the "looking through the window, who do I see, I see Gavin (or other name) looking at me" song every time they have class.

I was just so happy to see that he really does pay attention to other kids. They supposedly don't start playing WITH other kids so much until they reach about 3 years old, so that's not a problem at this time, but it's hard to tell how much he is really noticing what the other kids are doing for play, etc. Although, I have noticed he has been doing considerably better about sitting at the table with the other kids during snack-time in their classes. he still doesn't eat that much, but he can see that the other kids do eat their snacks, and I see him taking it all in, looking around at everyone watching them while he's eating his snacks. What a great decision to put him in 2 classes this fall! He's getting so much interaction and socialization out of them! (I'm sure his feeding therapy with the other little boy is helping too.)

Wow, I'm late updating!

Oops. I kept meaning to update this blog, and kept running out of time. To sum up the last 2 months:
Gavin had his 3 year testing (at 2 year, 9 months according to their protocol) through the school. He tested below average on the social part of speech, like answering questions and responding to cues. He tested pretty much average on the expressive part of speech that included vocabulary, but lower on receptive. He tested highest on the gross/fine motor stuff. All it means is that we need to work on asking him questions (and not just "what is that?" More like "what do you use to do blank?" or verb questions, since verbs were not his strong point.) Speech therapy is going to start coming out more often, and the early education teacher (Emily) will continue to come out once a week.
We took Gavin to the new pulmonologist, and she was completely in agreement about Gavin not starting preschool at this time. She wants him to not use oxygen for a whole winter before she allows him to start school (he used it more than once last winter, including in March of this year.) She thinks he is having trouble with reflux which is exacerbating his lung problem, so we're supposed to start on Prevacid again (I still haven't gotten it filled. Too busy!)
We had a great trip to VT in late Sept. Too short of a visit, and we had colds for the first week, and didn't get to see everyone we wanted to, but at least we got back for a while. He only got to see his cousins for one day, but they made up for lost time in those few hours they were together. The house was like a zoo! Gavin had a great time!
We had a speech therapy assessment at the same place he does feeding therapy. The therapist there (Lonnie) said his expressive language was ok,but receptive was a bit low, and she wanted him to work on question words. Same stuff as the school found. So she is going to be doing therapy once a week with him. (We had our first appt yesterday, and she said he's already doing better. Probably because I've been working with him on that. i.e. "Who pulls the mail?" "Who hates getting stuck in the rain?" I used his Thomas trains as questions, since I know he's familiar with them. He didn't get what I was asking, at first, but got better with it. He wasn't always right when he answered, but at least seemed to get the idea. I've also been getting him to answer yes/no questions. That was the same thing, he didn't get it at first, but is doing better with it.

That's enough of an update for now. Maybe I'll get around to posting more about the VT trip later.

Independence for all!

My little man has become SO independent recently. I thought he was before. No- that was nothing compared to the last week or so! (Now, I think some of it is because this last week was so hectic for him, maybe he wanted SOMETHING HE could control. But no matter why...)
First of all, we have a laundry chute in the bathroom. I never let him throw clothes down there because I'm worried he might start throwing other stuff down the chute, or fall down in (he's small enough so he fits right in the opening), and almost never let him see ME throw clothes down there either. But the other day when I was waiting for him to finish on the toilet, I threw a few clothes from the floor down into the chute. He burst out crying. I didn't realize why at the time, so just helped him get off the toilet, pull his pants up and go to the other room. It finally dawned on me what the problem was, so I asked him if HE wanted to throw clothes down the chute. He didn't answer, but got quieter, so I picked up a pair of socks and a towel from his floor and brought them into the bathroom and let him climb up on the step (cover to a kids potty chair) to throw the clothes down. He was much happier.
I don't remember if it was the same night, or the next night, but he knew it was bedtime, was playing in his room for a few minutes, then I turned off his overhead light (we have a low-level light on for him at night) and went to gather him up for reading his bedtime story. He burst out crying. I told him that he KNEW it was bedtime, and had been good about it before, so I didn't know what the problem was. He still continued to cry. Finally I asked him, "Did YOU want to turn off the light?" He slowed down his crying. So I carried him over to the light switch, let him turn the light on, then off again. No more tears. He was so much happier and went to bed like normal.
A few days ago, Terry changed Gavin's diaper (and for months now, he has asked Gavin to throw away the wet diaper afterwards--it's kind of Gavin's job), but either Terry or I carried the diaper out and threw it away. Gavin was so distraught, he started crying, then ran out to the trash can, opened the cover, and tried to reach in and get the diaper (so HE could throw it away.) But the diaper was too far down, and Gavin leaned in too far, and got stuck! (I TRIED to get a picture, but wasn't fast enough!) Anyway, we took the diaper out and gave it to him so he could throw it away. All was right with the world then. He had completed HIS job.
What a big boy he's becoming! That he actually gets upset when he doesn't get to do HIS "chores" (nothing formal yet) or take part in running the household. Like I said, I think it's actually because he had such a stressful week, but whatever the reason, he feels very strongly about helping out with some things. So of course we're going to let him. I think it's important that kids help out with the household if they can, it makes them feel important.
We all went for a walk (including Jasmine) last weekend, and we let Gavin hold the dogs leash. He was so thrilled! He ran with her, stopped when she stopped, and only had to drop the leash once, when she was sniffing around mailboxes for a long time. He was so proud of himself! So I've started realizing he really is ready to take part more in helping run the household.
2 nights ago, I realized I needed to run to the store for more drinks for him (before bed), so Terry was going to read him his books, give him his bottle, then put him to bed. Gavin looked at Daddy in his chair in his room, and said "Daddy, GET UP!", while still crying and holding onto me. SO, I took my customary place to read to him. Now, he's sometimes allowed Daddy to start the bedtime process, but not this night! I think he was just still wanting his Mommy, because he didn't let go of me for the longest time. Too much stress for him this week (between feeding therapy, starting one class, and doing age testing for preschool services), and he needed comforting. Which, of course, I feel sorry for him, but I also know it's typical development for his age! Poor little man. It's a rough transition for him, but at least I'll be there for him every step of the way!

Walking the dog

It was raining this morning when we took Gavin to his first "group" feeding therapy session, so we didn't stop at the park afterward. I didn't think anything of it, until this evening when we were eating dinner, Gavin said he wanted to go outside. I realized that except for walking to the car, he hadn't gone out at all today. So I said I'd take him for a short walk. But since I wasn't planning on going far, I thought we should try taking Jasmine too. So Terry came along to help out with Jasmine and Gavin. He handed Gavin the retractable leash for Jasmine, and off we went. Jasmine stopped a lot to pee, each time, with Gavin indicating "Jasmine go pee", (except he can't say "J" so it sounded more like "Davin go pee.") He held the leash the whole time, even breaking into a run sometimes when he felt like it, or when he needed to catch up to Jasmine. He had such a great time! The last time I gave him the leash to hold was several months ago, and he dropped it after just a couple of minutes. Watching him tonight, I was struck by how fast he's growing up, and how he can do so many things that I don't realize! For that matter, he understands a lot more than I realize, and remembers things that we don't think he would.

I know we need to give him things to do so that he feels like he's an important part of the family too, and that's what I learned tonight, is that I can ask him to do things I wouldn't normally think of, like hold Jasmine's leash so we can take her for a walk at the same time we go. I never used to take them out together, because it's just too much work for me to try to keep track of them both at the same time. But he did so well, I think we're going to start taking Jasmine with us more often. It just seemed to me like Gavin was such a big boy while walking the dog tonight. Guess he's growing up faster all the time!

County Fair 2010

We went to Isanti County Fair today (and Friday also.) Gavin could only handle it for 2 hours this time, compared to the 4 he did the other day, but that's certainly plenty! I took him on the Spinning Strawberries ride (like Teacups, but moved just a little slower probably), and then stood by him while he rode a horse on the Merry Go Round. I TRIED to take him on the Ferris Wheel, but apparently he had to be 36 inches (even if I went with him), which he isn't. My boy's too short to ride with a parent on the Ferris Wheel? Really? I guess there's probably a reason, like he could slide through and fall out or something. Guess we'll have to try for next year.
He seemed to enjoy the 2 rides I did take him on though. Plus, he had fun dancing in front of the H3 that the Army had there. Daddy would crank up the music and Gavin would dance on the ground in front of the speakers.

farm in IA

We went to Terry's friends house in Iowa over 4th of July weekend. We left after he got out of work on Thursday, arriving there about 10:30 pm that night. His friend had an RV they let us use for the weekend so we had some privacy. A bonus was that it confined Gavin to a small area, and we didn't need to use a baby gate to keep him out of anything!
He had to sleep between his Mommy and Daddy, so nobody got quite enough sleep, but did pretty well. He especially liked their black Labs, and the chickens that ran around the yard all day. Gavin chased them somewhat, but not into a frenzy. He did quite well with them, and even talked back to them a few times. The rooster would crow, or a hen would cluck, and he'd "talk" to them. He had a great time seeing the chickens.
Saturday night, we got to ride one of the horses. Not for a long time, but it was still nice. Gavin went around on the horse with me first, then since he wanted to go again, Terry switched places with me and took Gavin around a couple more times. He still didn't want to get off the horse, so Gavin got to ride the horse by himself, while Daddy walked beside the horse, and Josh led the horse around. Gavin had a great time, until it was time to get off the horse so it could be put away for the night! He wanted to keep going!
The next day it rained the majority of the day, so we stayed inside a lot. Fireworks were postponed till the next night, but we had to leave during the day on Monday so missed them. We never did get back on the horses there, but Gavin found another source of amusement. He climbed in the front seat of the RV and pretended to drive (he even informed me that "I drive!")
It constantly amazes me how much stuff he knows, when he says something like that to me.
We gave him a bath the first day we were there, and he asked me about bubbles (as in, why weren't there any?) I told him we didn't have bubbles there, but we would for his next bath at home. He turned to Terry and said he wanted bubbles, so Terry told him that no, he didn't need bubbles right then. Gavin turned to me and said "Tell Daddy I need bubbles." It was so clear that we both started laughing. Of course, we were both pretty impressed at his being able to verbalize like that, plus, it was such a normal kid thing to say!
The next night while Terry was taking a shower, Gavin spilled his juice box on the table and himself, so I said "geez, you should just go take a shower with Daddy." I got some napkins to clean up the table, then heard Terry asking from the bathroom, if I let Gavin in there. Gavin had understood what I said, and thought I was telling him to take a shower (even though we've never given him one before), so he headed in to join Daddy. He had a pretty good time playing with the water falling from above!
It was a pretty good trip. Gavin got a little overwhelmed a few times, but the experience was great for him. We might even try to go back again sometime.

He's growing up so quickly

Or at least it seems so. Tonight, I was reading one of his favorite books to him before bed. The book is "Biscuit goes to the farm." Biscuit is a puppy, and is the main character of a series of these books. He loves Biscuit books, even though we only have like 3 of them so far. So I was reading it to him, and on one page, it showed a piglet along with Biscuit. So after I read the words on the page, I pointed to the pig first and said "here's the piglet, and there's the puppy." He pulled the bottle of pediasure out of his mouth (I've found recently that he's drinking better if I read to him while he drinks), pointed to the puppy and said "that's Biscuit." Like he was just making sure I knew that was the puppys name. I just thought it was cute, but also realized at that time how much he seems to have grown up recently.

2 months ago he was barely saying any words, now he interrupts his bottle to make sure I'm reading the book correctly. He also takes the bottle out of his mouth just to read a specific page in the book (well, he doesn't READ it, he remembers what it says after we've read it to him so many times.) It's "Woof woof, Oink oink, Honk" since it's the puppy speaking, then the piglet, the the geese. Pretty easy for him to remember those words since he knows what sounds the animals make. Anyway, he does it EVERY time I get to that page. He loves "reading" the book to me. It's like he's so impressed with himself that he can do it too!

Let's see. What else. Oh, he can count to 11 on his own now. He could only count to 8, then to 10, now it's 11. We keep telling him 11, 12, but so far he's just gotten the 11 part. Not a problem. He doesn't even turn 2 1/2 for a few more days, and he says those on his own while running around or whatever. He can say most of the alphabet on his own, but tends to forget a few letters. What he DOES say, though, is in order. It's cute. He used to love pointing out the letter "E", but when he says the alphabet, it's A,B,C,D,F,G, etc. And "F" is pronounced "Epp", unless it's in a word, like "flag." Kind of like, he can pronounce the letter "M" in the alphabet, but when he refers to me, I'm "Bobby", like what it might sound like if he had a cold, except that he doesn't. I don't mind, except I do wonder how I went from "Momma" to "Bobby." Not a big problem at this time though.

Terry's company had a picnic yesterday at the Veterans Rest Home right outside of Forest Lake. Gavin had a pretty good time. Not so much in the beginning, but he liked it better as time went by. He tried to play soccer with the bigger boys, and had a great time dancing to the music playing on the car stereo. Then he laid down on our blanket and played with his cars a lot. There was a little girl there that kept trying to play with him, that he didn't care anything about, but when we brought him over to the beach (his first time!), he played a lot with the little girl over there. She had a ball that they threw back and forth (kind of anyway!) in the water. He seemed to like her, and I think she wasn't much different age than the other girl, but whatever. Maybe it was because the first girl didn't speak at all, and the 2nd one did. I don't know, but everyone is like that. We like some people, and don't care as much for others.
He liked walking in the sand, both dry and wet (I figured he'd object to it because of his sensory issues), and loved watching the waves come up and splash over his legs. It was kind of chilly, so he didn't get the upper part of his body wet, but we are definitely going to have to take him to the beach more often, now that we know where one is. Of course, I'm hoping there's one closer than that to us!