Gavin's friend?

Last week after speech therapy, another mother and I were talking about how our kids loved "Cars" movie. We discussed characters, and she said they had some duplicates at home, so on Tuesday, she brought a couple of them in for Gavin. So he asked me later why the other boy brought those cars to him. I said we were going to swap them. I was going to bring in Fillmore the bus today for him. So today, we brought Fillmore in for the other boy. After they got there (after Gavin's therapy was over), Gavin went right up to the boy, who he's only seen a couple of times before and we don't even know his name. He went right to the boy and handed him Fillmore. The boy showed his mom and said "look what that boy gave me!" The mother asked him (as she was looking at me) "Did he REALLY give you that?" (Apparently she figured the boy took it from Gavin.) So I said yes, he really did give her son that. She told him to make sure he thanked Gavin. He did, and Gavin gave him a hug. It was so heartwarming! Later, they were playing together on the floor with cars when the boy's mother said they had to go to the store. Gavin insisted we go to the store too. He started whining because he was sad that the boy left. He sounded like a puppy! I kept telling him I didn't know what store the other boy went to, so we couldn't go too, but he was really insistent that "We'll go to Walmart too!" (even though we didn't know if the boy and his mother were going to that store. He was really quite sad that his new friend left. It made me sad for him, so I just held him and rubbed his back for several minutes before agreeing that we could go to a thrift store to look for more "Cars" characters. I was just so pleased that he felt that much of a connection to this other boy. It's not the only one he's played with at therapy, so I don't know what it was, but we'll have to see if we can find time to see this other boy (think his name is Mason) more often, I think. Gavin will probably demand it.

Sympathy!

Gavin has apologies down! The other day after therapy, he had been taking a toy from another boy sometimes, and I kept having him give it back. After he gave it back one time, I noticed the other boy crying and holding his head. I didn't THINK Gavin hurt him, but wasn't sure if he had thrown a car back to the other boy, and the other kid hit his head or what, so I told him I knew he hadn't meant to hurt the other boy, but I thought he did, so he should go say he was sorry. He crossed the room to where the other boy was sitting, knelt down and said "I'm sorry. I didn't mean to hurt you." The other boy tried to push him away, and Gavin repeated "I wasn't trying to hurt you. I'm sorry." Apparently the other boy was pretty much ok after that, because he started slowly going back to playing. I could see Gavin hadn't gotten up, but looked confused, and I wondered why. Not for very long though, because as soon as the other boy bent his head down to play on the floor, Gavin kissed the spot where the boy had been holding his hand to his head. He ended up kissing the boy's head 3 times. He had just been trying to find an opening to do that! His mother turned to me and asked how old Gavin was, and how long he had had that ability (apologies). I told her that we had been working on sympathy recently, but had just started to really get it. Truthfully, it's just been in the last few weeks I think that he heartfeltedly apologized to us, and never had to another person. I know the school would sometimes tell him to say he was sorry to another kid, but I don't know as I believe in teaching kids to just go and say they're sorry. I think teaching them about the real reason they should apologize is better, like to say they didn't mean to hurt someone else. I think that's why Gavin understands it a whole lot better than some kids, to whom "I'm sorry" are just empty words. I was so proud of his apology!

Why/Because

Today, I was working with Gavin on learning the why/because type of question and answer. I gave him simple examples, so hope he figured it out. We also read the short version of "Pinocchio" that he took out from the library. He really seemed to like the name "Gepetto" since he repeated it multiple times. I think he got the idea of what a lie is, because I gave him simple examples of that also. We talked to Nate earlier, and he said he and Jenn used to tell Ari that when you lie, a red dot shows on your forehead that your mom and dad can see. He said she used to cover her forehead with her hand for several years when she lied. That must have been pretty obvious! Sounds like a good idea to use with kids! Although, Gavin's not really lying at this stage yet. He did once, but hasn't gotten really into it yet.

The Opthamologist called today, and said he should see Gavin every couple of months, to keep track of how much his eyes are crossing and if they're getting better. (We noticed it in October, but once he started wearing glasses, they didn't cross quite as much. He's been wearing glasses and these little pieces of tape stuff on the inside of them, called intra-nasals, I think, for months, and his eyes have gotten better.) He had an MRI a few weeks ago just to make sure he didn't have a tumor or anything, and that was fine.

medical update

We went to see the Nephrologist on Thursday. Gavin's bp was higher than it should be, so the doctor wants him to start taking a bp med. Because high blood pressure can cause multiple problems, she wants us to get an ECHO of Gavin's heart to see if the left ventricle might have thickened. She wants to make sure we keep checking his eyes since hypertension can affect the eyes. The doctor said she wants him to have another renal ultrasound in a few months, so we can compare it to this last year. We'll have to keep checking his kidneys as he grows, since we don't know how much, if any, they will grow. Right now, the largest of his kidneys is only in the 25 percentile for his height, which probably means they're not working as efficiently as they should. But as he grows, one or both kidneys could keep growing, increasing their efficiency. We just don't know yet.
They took blood to check multiple things like electrolytes, so after it comes back, we can check with a renal dietician to see if she wants us to put Gavin on any special diet or anything.
We saw the Endocrine doctor today. She said some of the blood-work was endocrine related, so wants to see what that shows before thinking about giving Gavin growth hormone shots. She wants him to have a bone age x-ray before we see her again. She also noticed that his thyroid labs weren't quite right. His TSH was high, so she is starting him on a low-dose thyroid medicine to see if that makes a difference.
She also said that sometimes when he doesn't seem to want to eat, it may be from ketosis,so we should give him some juice or something and see if that makes him hungry afterwards.
WHEW! So many things going on right now! I'll have to write about other stuff later.

Gavin got bullied for the first time

We went to McDonald's Playland today, and there was another boy there, maybe 3-4 years old, just a bit bigger than Gavin. He kept pretending to be a monster and reaching out for Gavin. Gavin, in return, screeched and ran back to me, saying "No! I want Mom!" I did eventually get him to stop screeching, but each time the other boy growled and reached his arms out to get Gavin (he never actually touched Gavin), Gavin shouted "No!" then ran back to me, scared, thinking the "monster" was going to get him.
One of the times, I put him on the playset past where the other boy was sitting (waiting for Gavin to try to pass by). I heard running in the tunnels of the playset, then Gavin RAN down the tunnel, with the other boy chasing him, so apparently the game had progressed to chasing instead of just blocking Gavin from getting onto the playset. I was getting kind of annoyed since the kid stopped Gavin a good 20 times, and his mom didn't say anything to her son. Meanwhile, I was just concentrating on comforting Gavin when he'd run back, and trying to convince him to just walk right by the other kid. Gavin got more courage every time I'd tell him, but then would still back out before he made it past the other kid. Luckily, the mom finally decided it was time for them to leave, since she and her other kid were done eating. It had gotten to the point I was going to just talk to the other boy myself, but wanted to see if Gavin could work it out on his own. Apparently, he couldn't quite this time, but it did give him experience dealing with another kid I guess.
After they left, another mom in the play area said "there goes the playground bully", since she had witnessed the whole deal. I didn't think of it as that serious at the time, but I guess she's right- that's probably how bullying starts. The other boy started out just playing, but then when he saw how much of a reaction he got out of Gavin, he kept doing it. And no one spoke to him about it. I should have, but didn't realize how much it was actually bothering Gavin. After all, he was joining in the fun for a while. I thought he was just playing or pretending it bothered him. But after a while, he wasn't. And I kept thinking the boy's mother would speak to him, as I would have if Gavin was bothering another kid. But she didn't. How easy it is for a little kid like Gavin to get bullied!

Nephrology summary

A few weeks ago we went to see Dr. Najera about Gavin's kidney ultrasound and bloodwork. She said based on his ultrasound, his kidneys are small for his height, possibly indicating Renal Dysplasia. She said based on the creatinine level from his bloodwork, she thought he probably had about 50% function in his kidneys, although she didn't know if it was one or both kidneys, and what caused it. She ordered a VCUG to test for possible kidney reflux, or see if there were structural abnormalities. The VCUG was done last Tuesday, and the radiologist was able to tell me at the time that he didn't see any reflux or structural problems. We haven't heard from Dr. Najera with the results though. So we aren't really sure if she's officially diagnosed him with Renal Dysplasia or not, and what, if any treatment she wants to do.
She assumed he was born with his kidneys not fully developed, but wasn't sure. It sounds to me that it's a bad sign if that's the case. If it was a structural problem, they could probably do surgery. But anyway, we still have to wait to hear from the doctor to see what she has decided. Hope it doesn't involve any special diet, since it's hard to get the kid to eat a lot anyway.

Gavin really wants a popsicle!

Gavin's been sick for a week now, but does at least have an appetite now. So Terry was on the phone to his mother tonight when I saw Gavin grab the handle of the fridge, and start walking his feet up. So Terry put the phone next to Gavin's head and said "Tell Grandma what you're doing." Gavin replied "I'm climbing up the fridge." Quite true! So Terry took the phone back to go in the other room for a minute, at which time Gavin said "I know where the freezer pop is!" very insistently, because he was using the handle of the fridge to climb up to get to the freezer, apparently to get a freezer pop.
He sure is starting to sound like a typical kid sometimes!